I was in a car picked up by a professional sailor, who was trying to make it to the shore for work the next morning. He told me he come take me to either Genova or he could drop me at a gas station half-way from Genova to France. It was already late, 11pm, and I looked online for a place to stay in Genova. Nothing came up. I decided to pull an all nighter.
The Sailor tells me about the dynamics of hitch hiking boats across continents. Good information, I’ll have to use it someday.
We get to gas station and it’s time for me to get out. I thank him for the ride and wish him a good life.
It’s midnight now. No one is there, no cars are passing by. I’m obviously close to Monaco because the first car that rolls up is clearly expensive, whatever the hell it was. It’s only a two seater and It’s a guy with his child. I don’t even bother to ask.
I do the only logical thing when it’s midnight at a gas station with no ride, no plans, and no place to sleep. I start drinking, A LOT. I buy a few beers from the gas station, they only have them behind the counter. I pound a few pretty quick.
After I’m a bit tipsy, I get lucky and a polish couple show up. I notice by their license plate. I say “dobry wieczór” I was too tired and drunk to speak polish in a coherent way so we quickly switch to English.
So they have room for me. On the way, I’m ninja-drinking beer. They’re heading into France and they decide to drive around Monaco a bit to check it out. This is when they discover that I’m drinking in their car. They’re not very excited about my bad behavior and they ask me to get out of the car. I think, eh, whatever, you win some, you lose some. Have a good day!
So there I was; stuck on a lonely road, at about 3 AM, drunk, with all my stuff. So I do the only reasonable thing. Start walking down the road with my thumb out.
It doesn’t take long when a van stops. It’s a French guy who picks me up. I tell him my problem and that I’m looking for a place to sleep. He tells me he’s homeless and he sleeps in his van but that he knows a great place on the beach to sleep a couple kilometer down the road. I follow his advice but when I get there, it smells like piss. Fuck this, I think.
I continue walking down the road with my thumb out. I take notice of the steep cliff to my left and the beautiful ocean view. It’s dark out so I can’t see it that well but I can hear the sounds of waves crashing against the shore.
This time, It’s a two-door car that stops and two French guys get out at the same time. They’re smiling big and say come, come join us. I’m a little surprised at their eagerness but I’m desperate enough so I decide to jump into the car. They throw me in the back and with my bag in lap; they get back into the car and slam the doors.
So they start off little slow, “Where are you from?”. “What are you doing here?” I answer them curiously, wondering why they’re so excited to pick me up and what’s going on in their heads so I decide to inquire.
“What’d you guys do tonight?”
And together they shout. “WE DID COCAINE AND WE HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE!!!”
The guy in the passenger’s seat decides to start punching the driver in this moment. BAM!! BAM!! BAM!! over and over again. This causes him to start swerving on this road, to the edge cliff, and back, then to the edge cliff again, then back. I now imagine myself crashing against the shore instead of the waves. I don’t think the sound would be as pleasant.
It’s impossible for me to jump out so I just let go and start laughing hysterically. . I Think to myself, “Atleast if I died, it wouldn’t hurt so bad thanks to the alcohol”.
We arrive in the next city where, I figure I can find a bed. They let me out, acting like nothing happened. I thank them for the ride, and decide to stop for the night.
Oh, the fun of Hitch Hiking.
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